Matatus I’ve seen this week

I thought I would share some of the more interesting names for matatus I have seen this week. These are the decals that are spread across the front windscreen or backwindow, they all have some form of decal or other. So, in no particular order:

Tel Aviv III

The question here isn’t why it is called Tel Aviv but more importantly what happened to Tel Aviv I and Tel Aviv II?

Vuvuzela

Winner for most apt name for a matatu: noisy, annoying but cheap

Hague Option

It took me a little while to get this one too but let me explain: After the post election violence Kenya had a choice to try the perpetrators locally or at the Hague. These choices garnered much debate in Kenya and they went with the Hague Option. So, it works as a name for a matatu and the driver possibly reads ‘Private Eye’, but clearly the most political matatu I’ve seen.

The Abigail Legacy

There is definitely a story here, possibly even a country & western song: ‘My lady left me and now I’m driving a matatu’

Chicharito

This is only really to note that whilst I have also seen a Drogba matatu; I haven’t seen a Rooney matatu. I have however seen a clapped out taxi with Rooney splashed across its windscreen, which I thought was appropriate.

Ebenezer

I think this one is a seasonal one, granted they could have gone for Santa but Ebenezer works.

Neocolonizm

Not only do I like the politics of this one, I love the spelling! Ain't nothing about neo about my colon matey.

Livin on self trust

We have yet to comment on the popularity of self-help books in Kenya, but on the basis that I think this particular matatu was living on self trust and self trust alone, I can safely say the driver was fan of many a self-help book. Also, I prefer to trust things like traffic lights and brakes.

Reaper

I declined to board this particular matatu. I know Iron Maiden sang ‘Don’t fear the Reaper’ but you know what? You can’t be too careful with these things.

40 Thieves

Likewise with this one, a matatu I thought it best to avoid. Matatus are only supposed to carry 14, and granted I have actually been on one with 18 passengers and a few chickens, but I still think 40 and them being thieves is too much. I haven’t seen the partnering ‘Ali Baba’ matatu though.

Veni, Vidi, Vici

Ah, I thought to myself, a matatu driver with a classical education! Perhaps not, I reflected but still I think all matatu drivers can empathize with crossing the Rubicon (that is, if it was the quickest route to town)

But this week’s winner:

Quit Work, Be A Ninja

I love the sentiment of this one, passengers boarding this particular Public Service Vehicle will say to themselves: ”of course my life choices to date have been completely wrong: I should just become a ninja!”